Every morning at seven AM (give or take ten minutes), I hear Henry on the baby monitor, awake and attempting to rouse Miranda.
“Ehn-wee! Ehn-wee!” He yells.
At least once a day something along the lines of the following is heard in our house:
Me: “Where is Henry?”
(He points to himself.)
Me: “Where is Miranda?”
(He points to her.)
Me: “Henry! Say ‘Miranda!’”
Him: “Eh-nwee!”
Me: “Dude.” (Sigh.) “Okay. Say, ‘Muh!’”
Him: “MUH!”
Me: “‘Ran!’”
Him: “WAN!”
Me: “‘Duh!’”
Him: “DUH!”
Me: “‘Miranda!’”
Him: “EH-NWEE!”
It’s funny, no question. It’s freaking adorable, is what it is. It is a parlor trick when we have guests. Isn’t that so cute? we say. Yet he totally knows what her name is.
I’ve tried very hard in the past almost-two-years of their lives not to refer to them as, “The Twins.” This has been a conscious decision, as I didn’t want to get into the habit of automatically treating them as one unit. My mother and aunt were constantly referred to as “The Twins†growing up, and I know that must have made it hard for them to feel their own senses of individuality. While I cannot stop others (even Mom and Auntie!) from referring to Henry and Miranda as “The Twins,†I have done my best to — in their own home — treat them as the individuals that they are. A while back someone referred to my kids as “Ethan and The Twins,” and I remember thinking, Wait! Those ‘Twins’ have names, you know! They are each their own person!
And yet I’ve come to learn that as different as they are from one another, they are most definitely a partnership. When they were babies, they had practically nothing to do with one another, but now? Now they are playmates, compatriots, partners-in-crime (or attempted crime). This morning when Henry decided he wanted nothing more in the world than to have his PJs back on, and started crying about it, Miranda came up to him, cocked her head in his face and said, “Sah-wee,” (‘sorry’) in a soothing way. They comfort each other — take care of each other. They hand the other their sippy cups of milk, pacifiers, toys. They make each other laugh. When they enter preschool in the fall they will have each other, and that is very reassuring.
I don’t cringe as much anymore when I hear people refer to them as “The Twins.” *I* know they are individuals. *I* know they are not merely one person split into two. I know that what they have is a special bond they will have forever. They are connected in a partnership that to the outside world makes them seem like one unit. I think I’m okay with that.
So when I ask Henry to tell Miranda to hurry up and come on when we’re heading out the door and he says, “G’mon, Ehn-wee!” I just have to laugh.
I might actually be sad when he stops calling her, “Ehn-wee.”
One day, she will make him call her by her name. It will be one of their many “fights”. That’s the joy of having a sibling who is very close. We fight like we’re going to do murder one second, then we play barbies for an hour.
My sister and I were just “the girls”. Same same but different.